New Atlantis Bundle, Books1-3 Read online

  Not this, please!

  And then there was a loud clang, as something hit the metal dumpster. And her attacker wasn’t there anymore. They were fighting. Why were they fighting each other? There was a loud umph and a crack, as someone hit the wall. Then there was quiet.

  At first, she couldn’t believe her ears. It was just part of the nightmare. She heard her name. Jac was saying her name. He said ‘Cara, it’s me Jac, you’re okay, I’m here.’

  And suddenly she could see him, and she knew he was real. But her leg hurt so much. She whimpered, from the raw agony of it.

  Then Jac wasn’t looking at her anymore. He was looking at one of the guys who was standing in front of them. Jac told her to open the Portal. And it took her forever to find the PA, and to activate the calibrator. Precious seconds passed while the PA recalculated their position. Then the activation button had begun to blink, and she had stabbed at it desperately. Wanting to be gone. Needing to be back in the safety of her new world.

  The Portal had lit the street like a halogen beam. She could see Jac crouched, ready to attack. She could see the thin, nightmare of a youth, his bald head shining in the light. And the gun. Oh, the nightmare was suddenly so much worse. He had a gun, and he was waving it at Jac. Threatening Jac.

  ‘Get to the Portal,’ he’d told her. And she’d tried. But her leg was excruciating, and all she could do was drag herself toward it, trying to keep her broken leg as stable as possible.

  Then everything happened at once. Jac was grabbing her, and yanking her into the Portal. Her leg was agony. But she heard loud gunshots – one, two, three, in quick succession. And then the light had gone on forever.

  When she fell onto the stone floor of the dais, she’d felt relief. Home. They were home! The nightmare was over. Jac had saved her.

  But when she looked over at him, crumpled at her side, she saw that he was drowning in blood. There was blood all over his shirt and a river of it was running out of his slack mouth. His eyes looked at her, but she didn’t know if he could see her. There was so much blood.

  She’d started screaming then, in earnest, calling for him, telling him to stay with her. But his eyes got less focused, and the lids slowly closed. For a moment she thought he was dead.

  The chaos around her pressed in, drawing her attention. There was a medivac team approaching, and they lifted Jac up onto a hover-bed. Someone lifted her up in their arms.

  Then they were moving. All she could see was the waving threads of light on the cavern roof above her.

  She heard them talking: Too much damage. Wouldn’t survive. Too much damage.

  ‘Get a clone! Integrate him! Get a clone!’ she screamed at them.

  ‘He has no clones left. He can’t integrate again,’ a male voice said, gently. There was defeat in that voice.

  Her mind was suddenly crystal clear.

  This was not going to happen. They were not going to let this happen!

  An image of Hakon flashed into her mind – tall, Nordic cold, and so very formal, welcoming her to this new world. Why was she remembering that?

  Then it came to her.

  ‘Hakon’s clone! Integrate him with Hakon’s clone!’ she screamed at them.

  Again the gentle voice spoke to her. ‘You cannot integrate with any but your own DNA, Cara. And even if that were possible, Jac’s Consciousness has reached its limit.’

  ‘NO!’ she screamed the denial. ‘He’ll do it. I know he will. Jac wants to live. He won’t leave me. Try it. For God’s sake, just try it. What will it cost? If it doesn’t work, then at least you’ve tried!’

  Her voice was hoarse from screaming. The agony from her leg was making her sick. But she fought to get out of the arms that held her, to get to Jac. She had to get to Jac. They had to save him.

  ‘It’s not possible,’ said the gentle voice, holding her more tightly. She threw out her arm, and caught the owner of that voice with the back of her closed fist.

  ‘Do it! You think you have all the god-damn answers, don’t you? But I’m telling you, Jac won’t give up without a fight. He won’t. Give him the chance. Please, just give him the chance!’

  There were voices around her, arguments as they moved on. Then they were injecting her with something. And she fought them again.

  No, they can’t knock me out. If I’m not awake, I can’t fight for him. I have to fight for him!

  As the world started to fade, she heard the only words that could give her hope that her nightmare might have an end.

  ‘We have nothing to lose...’

  Chapter Fifteen

  Cara could hear voices. They were soft but insistent, and she knew she needed to listen to them. Something important was happening. She needed to listen and wake up. Jac needed her. But the voices went away. And when she lifted her heavy eyelids, she could see nothing but whiteness.

  Was she in the Portal? But if that were the case, why wasn’t she hearing the deafening buzz that went with that light? She blinked her eyes, trying to make them more responsive. Finally, the white became less blurry, and she started to identify shapes. This was the medical centre. She knew this ward. Or one like it. This was where she’d been, only a few months ago. It felt like years ago. So much had happened.

  ‘Cara, are you awake?’ The female voice had an Australian accent. She recognised it as Maggie’s. Then the familiar, young face appeared in her line of vision. And she was smiling at her.

  Why was she smiling, when her world was falling apart? Didn’t she know she was in danger of losing the greatest love of her life? There would be no getting past this one. No bouncing back. If Jac died because of her, trying to save her, she would never forgive herself. And she didn’t want to live without him at her side.

  Don’t smile at me, Maggie! This nightmare won’t end, and you’re smiling at me?

  ‘Can you hear me, Cara?’ Maggie said again, and to stop her asking, and to stop her smiling, Cara nodded her head.

  ‘Oh, great! We were worried about you. Millie is here with me. She was worried, too. But everything’s fine, now. Everything’s fine!’

  What kind of fool was she? Everything wasn’t fine. Jac was probably dead, and it was all her fault. If she hadn’t been so stubborn about Jumping, she wouldn’t have got herself into trouble. She wouldn’t have needed Jac to rescue her. And he would be all right.

  Jac would be all right.

  ‘Jac…’ She didn’t know whether she said the word out loud or not. But Maggie was still smiling down at her.

  ‘Yeah, Jac made it. He’s going to be fine. Do you hear me, Cara? Jac is going to be fine.’

  She wasn’t sure she heard right. Maybe she was still dreaming. Jac was all right? Jac was alive? How could he be? They had said there was too much damage. They’d said there was no hope. Hadn’t they?

  She struggled to sit up, but Maggie gently pressed her back down. She was as weak as a kitten. For some reason, the tears started filling her eyes then, blurring her vision again. Why was she crying, if Jac was all right? Loud, racking sobs broke free. She cried out her pain, anguish and relief.

  Maggie just patted her hand, while she sobbed her heart out. Then she wiped Cara’s face with a soft cloth.

  ‘Your leg’s in a cast. You fractured your shin and tore some ligaments. So try to keep still, okay? Jac isn’t awake yet. The integration took a little more time than usual.’

  ‘Integration?’ Cara couldn’t believe her ears. Had they really tried integration? But Jac had no clone shell awaiting him. What had they used?

  Then she remembered Hakon. His clone would have been awaiting use, not yet destroyed so soon after Hakon had died in-situ. They had used Hakon’s body. That had to be it. But how?

  ‘Yes. They decided to take your suggestion. Karl is very impressed by you. Quite a few people are impressed by you, Cara. So they gave it a try. And it worked. Against all the odds, it worked.

  ‘You are going to have to get used to your Jac looking like someone else, but it seems th
e integration worked. No one can be sure, until he wakes up, of course. I mean, he might still not be able to create the necessary neural pathways in a brain that is unfamiliar to him. But he’s in there. All his vitals are stable and operating independently. He is alive.’

  Cara stared at the white ceiling. She wanted to feel hope. But so much had gone wrong, in so short a space of time, it seemed impossible that hope could exist. Yes, it was a miracle that his life force, his Consciousness, had made the shift. That was totally unheard of. But there was a long way between being alive and being a coherent, fully functioning man. Hadn’t she worked with enough kids with brain damage to know that?

  No, they were a long way from hope.

  ‘I want to go to him,’ she said at last, struggling to get up on her bent elbows.

  ‘Okay, I’ll get the orderly, and we can get you into a hover-chair. It’s going to be a shock, Cara. He doesn’t look like your Jac. Remember that. He looks like that blonde Jumper – the really tall one.’

  ‘Hakon. He looks like Hakon.’

  ‘Yes. Him. So don’t get freaked out, okay?’

  Cara couldn’t help smiling. Maggie was always so formal in her speech and behaviours, when she was around the New Atlanteans. But when they were together, she usually slipped back into their common jargon.

  ‘I won’t freak out, I promise.’

  They had her in a hover-chair in a matter of minutes, and she was on her way into the next ward. As they came around the doorway, she could see that they were removing something hastily. It was Jac’s body. It had to be. Did she want to see it? Yes, she did.

  ‘Please, if that’s Jac’s old shell I… I would like to see it. One last time?’

  There were a few quiet words exchanged, and then the cot containing the body was directed toward her. The sheet was pulled back, and Cara looked at the grey, dead face of her man. His lips were already blue. She expected him to look like he was sleeping. But he didn’t. He looked dead. Her Jac looked dead.

  With a shaking hand she swept the tawny lock of hair back from his forehead. She loved its colour. And those green, beautiful eyes. She would miss them, too. Stroking the still warm skin, she felt the tears stinging her eyes again. She sniffed them back.

  Jac wasn’t this body. If she had learned anything during her time in New Atlantis, it was that what made you had nothing to do with the body you inhabited. This wasn’t Jac anymore. This body she had kissed and taken into her own was not Jac anymore. She would miss this body. But it wasn’t Jac.

  Her Jac was on the other side of the divider, fighting to take control of a shell that wasn’t his own, just so that he could stay with her. If she had ever doubted his love for her, those doubts were gone now. Jac had broken the Natural Law to be with her. Not only had he gone beyond his nine lives, but he’d successfully animated a shell that was not his own. And there was only one reason why he’d have been able to do all that. Because he loved her.

  Because he loved her.

  She turned away from the familiar face, and allowed the attendants to direct the cot from the room. It was time. If she had to work with him the whole of her life – her lives – to get him integrated into this new body, she would. He’d done the impossible for her, and she would do her part for him. After all, she had plenty of experience working with those who were not neurotypical.

  Maggie directed her chair around the divider, and she had her first sight of Hakon. No, not Hakon… Jac.

  She took him in with her eyes: The white-blonde hair that was very like her own, the pale skin pulled tight over sharp, high cheekbones and prominent dimpled chin, thick, fair eyebrows that ran straight, rather than arching, over his closed eyes. The lips were thinner than Jac’s. Harder? No, not at this moment. They had just looked hard when Hakon had tightened them over his teeth. She had only met the man a few times. But each time, he’d seemed to be holding himself tight, like a soldier at attention.

  No, this face was relaxed, and that made it look so very young. Reaching out, she touched the square chin, with its slight dimple. Her Jac had no such dimple. No, she corrected herself. This was her Jac. The old Jac was no longer hers.

  Picking up the hand closest to her, she studied it. The fingers were long, like Jac’s, but far more knuckled. The thumb was longer, and set low on his hand. The palm was large and square, and there were almost no lines on it. She remembered this was what her new palm had looked like – almost no lines.

  She looked down at her palm, for the first time in months. There were new lines all over it. How fascinating! Why would all those lines suddenly appear? Certainly, she was using the hand, and wear and tear would have to be factored in. But why deep lines, so quickly? Her face wasn’t lined like this. Interesting!

  Turning back to the new Jac, she leaned in close, to smell him. The body smelled like chemicals. She couldn’t smell Jac. And she wouldn’t. This body would have a whole different scent. She just hoped it was pleasing to her. Chemistry, pheromones, had everything to do with scent. And if she didn’t like Hakon’s, then her sexual response to his body would be zero.

  But maybe that would be better, if Jac was unable to claim this body completely. Caring for him would be so much easier, if she wasn’t sexually aroused by him. Of course, if all it took was good looks, then she would have been all over Hakon. He was an incredibly handsome man, so tall –maybe two or three inches taller than Jac, with eyes that were as blue as a winter sky.

  Too good looking for me.

  Laughing to herself, she was aware how her usual self-image issues had arisen again. She was now a young, slim and pretty woman. Men looked at her when she passed. Jac found her more attractive than any woman he’d met for nearly three hundred years. Hakon’s good looks were not too good for her!

  The hand in hers suddenly twitched, and she glanced back at Maggie and Millie, who stood at a respectful distance behind her. The monitoring machines were ticking and humming away, none of them giving off an alarm. The twitch was not a bad thing.

  She looked down at the hand again, tightening her fingers around its palm. The fingers closed around hers.

  ‘Jac!’ she exclaimed, struggling to get out of the hover-chair. Maggie was at her side in an instant, helping her to stand on her one good leg, balancing against the cot.

  Peering down into the still face, waiting for some flicker of expression, was the hardest thing she’d ever done. She knew how much mental control it took to do even the simplest actions, like opening eye-lids. It was too soon for him to do such a thing. The amount of neural activity required to squeeze her fingers was immense. But then, maybe it was simply an autonomic response, like a baby wrapping its hand around a finger. Just reactive, not conscious control.

  As she worried and analysed, the golden eyelashes fluttered, then slowly lifted. Cara let out the breath she’d been holding since his fingers twitched. The blue eyes stared up at her unseeing. There was nothing of Jac in them. Her heart ached in her chest.

  ‘Jac?’ she called to him, stroking the side of his new face, hoping he could feel the sensation. The thin lips turned up at the corners.

  ‘He can’t see yet, remember.’ Maggie pointed out. Her hand was resting on Cara’s back, stabilizing her.

  ‘Oh yeah, I forgot. I thought he didn’t recognise me. But I guess I’m just a blur to him, right now.’

  The straight brows dipped down toward the long nose in a slight frown. Cara stroked his forehead until the frown eased.

  ‘Jac, you’re okay. You are integrating into a new shell. It’ll take a while to get control.’ She smiled down at him, trying to sound reassuring.

  Hakon’s mouth formed a kiss as he tried to make sound. A deep growl echoed up from his chest.

  Karl, his usual warm serenity rattled, rushed in and went to the other side of Hakon’s cot. He took out a small torch, and checked his patient’s pupil response.

  ‘So, our medical miracle is awake. Good to have you back, old man,’ Karl said, patting Hakon’s shoulder.<
br />
  The sound came again, this time recognisable as ‘wh’. Did he mean what? Where? When? Why? Each of those words could have been what Hakon/Jac was trying to say.

  ‘Can you hear and understand me, Jac?’ she asked. ‘Blink twice if you can.’ If they could determine his cognitive state, they would have a better idea how well Jac had been able to integrate with the new clone.

  The thick lashes dipped into a blink… twice. Cara sighed with relief.

  ‘If his cognative processes are up and running, we can be cautiously optimistic that his voluntary motor responses will come on line shortly.’ Karl took his Tablet from his upper pocket, and mentally connected to it. Cara could see data appearing on the screen.

  ‘Wh..at…’ Jac said in a gravelly croak.

  ‘What happened?’ Cara guessed.

  He blinked at her twice.

  ‘You were shot rescuing me from the Jump. That bastard fired three shots into your back, just as we entered the Portal. So much damage, Jac. They had to transfer you to a new clone.’

  ‘Noooo..’

  ‘Not possible?’ she guessed again, imaging she knew the way his thoughts would go.

  He blinked twice, faster this time.

  ‘Oh, babe, you have no idea!’ she answered, with feeling. ‘You’ve rewritten their text books for them. Not only have you broken the nine lives rule, but also the … I can’t even think what it would be called. You have integrated with a body that isn’t your own, Jac. This is huge!’

  The frown was back, and she could almost hear the cogs turning, as he tried to take in the information.

  ‘Whoo’

  ‘Whose body?’

  Two blinks.

  ‘Hakon’s. They hadn’t got around to destroying the shell after his death. It could have been worse. You might have got a woman’s clone.’ She tried to make light of it, but she was watching him intently.

  How would he feel about being in his dead friend’s body? Nothing like this had ever happened before. No one knew what kind of psychological traumas such an event might cause. A complete loss of identity? It was one thing to go back to a body you remembered from your youth, quite another to wake up with a new face – a face that belonged to someone you knew.